Welcome to HP Lovecraft "mad-libs." (Note: the quotes are because these are not actual Mad Libs®, but, rather, a cheap unlicensed knockoff.) Please fill in all the blanks, or your results will be disappointingly non-hilarious. If you fill in your e-mail address your results will also be sent to you via e-mail.

To see the results, press the submit button on the bottom. If you are feeling uncreative today, click on I give up and a bunch of words that I think are really amusing will automatically fill in. (Note: these will overwrite your own values, so you might use them to get you started, but don't click it after you've filled any in. Unless you hate them and want them to go away.)