I saw “Burn After Reading” and enjoyed it.
I also saw a preview for a dreadful-looking farce by David “Scary Movie” Zucker called “An American Carol” which seems to have been constructed exclusively for purposes of allowing things like the real Bill O’Reilly to pop a Michael Moore impersonator in the nose. In an outhouse.
Oh, the hilarity!
Anyway, as a liberal sitting in the audience, I found myself personally offended by the trailer. Yeah, yeah, I get it, all liberals hate America, that’s the only reason anybody could possibly disagree with you.
Everyone who votes for Democrats or liberals does so only because of our deep loathing for America. Every time we vote for a Democrat, it is because we are secretly hoping that he or she will give our country, or at least the Statue of Liberty, back to France.
Only the right wing is even capable of truly loving this country and its traditions. Oh, they hate the government, they hate the protection of individual rights guaranteed in the Constitution, they hate our “melting pot” history of immigration and multiculturalism, they hate our history of strikes, protests, marches, and other cantankerous manifestations of the First Amendment, they hate most of our art, they hate that people like Thomas Jefferson and Normon Rockwell were actually liberals, and they hate Democrats, liberals, homosexuals, women, blacks, Hispanics, Asians, people from the middle-east, Sikhs who wear turbans so they think they’re from the middle-east when they’re actually from India, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, atheists, Quakers, union members, people who live in California, people who live in New York City, and, generally, all the people who live in this country. But only they truly love the country itself.
Only the Republican-voting half of the country truly understands or respects the flag, which is why ripping a hole in it and wearing it as a (insert expletive) PONCHO, or putting a flag patch on the butt of your jeans, or having a flag-themed doormat is somehow extremely patriotic if you’re a Republican, yet hanging it upside-down in protest is extremely unpatriotic if you’re not.
Didn’t you get tired of making these complete non-points in 2003? And when are you people going to get over Michael Moore, anyway? Is he like the only liberal you know how to make fun of? Do you think he’s the only liberal there is, or something?
Do you present yourselves as simpleminded insensitive jerks on purpose, so that when people say you’re jerks, you can point your fingers and scream “unfair!”?
The right wing does not (insert expletive) OWN America, jerks.